I hope you enjoyed the Para Olympics – what an inspiration the competitors were for us all – hopefully the Olympic spirit will find its way to Andy Murray tonight.
Last month I asked if you had time to listen and I had some interesting responses. The consensus seems to be that listening is more of a challenge that most people are prepared to admit. We still seem to be keener to get our point across than listen to the other person’s opinion. So this month I’m asking if you have time to read, and understand. Well if you’ve got this far, can I keep you with me to the bottom of the page? ??It seems to me that sometimes we’re too busy to read more than even the header to an email – so we either guess, assume or make up what the email sender has said to us! How can that be? And then we wonder why we are miscommunicating with each other and disputes arise. If we get as far as reading the email, if we just take a few minutes longer to read it properly there would be more chance of understanding what we’re telling each other and this helps prevent a dispute.?? This has been borne out by my mediation experience in the last month. So it has got me thinking: what can we do about this?
The first thing is to speak to each other when we think there’s been a misunderstanding in writing. The truth is disarming. Don’t assume the other person has misunderstood you, as you may have misunderstood them. Don’t guess what the other person is thinking; ask them if you’re not sure. All assumptions are dangerous – even this one! So if a misunderstanding occurs – talk it through and if a disagreement ends up in a parting of the ways then so be it , but at least you will each have understood where you differ, and agreeing to differ is much better than ending a relationship which might be worth preserving. Who knows when you might need each other in the future? And if it’s a family disagreement – which was the mediation I conducted last week – it’s all the more painful for everyone concerned, and often the extended family as well. By the way it settled.
The initiative to introduce mediation as an early intervention for businesses has made progress. I met with a leading insurance company who are very interested in becoming involved. I’d be pleased to discuss this with you if you have any thoughts or experience in this area. ??Don’t forget my free, interactive one hour CPD seminar which I can conduct at your office. For more information or to request a free seminar, please email me using this link.
Let me leave you with this thought from Soren Kierkegaard: ‘People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use.’ That’s all for this update, enjoy the sunshine.
Roger
